Beyond Bad Attitudes: How to Confront Entitlement in the Fire Service
Entitlement is a problem I’m hearing about frequently in my interactions with leaders in the Fire Service. Most fire service leaders have seen it. Some have ignored it. Others have tried to deal with it and gotten pushback.
It shows up in small ways. Someone complains about cleaning the rig. Someone else refuses to take a shift they think is “beneath them.” Or a crew member doesn’t follow a basic rule because they think it shouldn’t apply to them.
Left unchecked, entitlement spreads. It lowers morale. It divides teams. It makes leaders feel stuck.
This post is about how to recognize entitlement, where it comes from, and what you can do about it.
What Is Entitlement?
Entitlement is the belief that someone deserves special treatment, rewards, or perks—without putting in the effort to earn them.
It’s not just annoying. It’s harmful. It breaks down respect. It damages team culture.
Entitlement says, “I deserve this because I’m me.” Not because of hard work. Not because of effort. Just because.
How Entitlement Shows Up
It doesn’t always look the same. But here are common signs:
1. Unrealistic Expectations
They expect praise or rewards without doing much to earn it. They might be new, but already think they should be treated like a senior firefighter.
2. Chronic Complaining
They complain about the basics—station duties, inventory checks, cleaning. These are the tasks everyone does. But they act like it’s beneath them.
3. Lack of Reciprocity
They want others to help them out. But they don’t return the favor. They take more than they give.
4. Disregard for Rules and Boundaries
They think policies don’t apply to them. They expect exceptions. They say, “Yeah, but that’s for everyone else.”
5. No Gratitude
They don’t say thank you. They don’t recognize help as a gift. They believe it’s what they’re owed.
6. Poor Reaction to Disappointment
When they don’t get what they want, they get angry. They don’t just feel let down—they feel wronged. And they might lash out or shut down.
Where It Comes From
Entitlement doesn’t start in the firehouse. It usually begins long before.
Upbringing
Some people grow up being told they’re special. They’re shielded from failure. They don’t learn limits. And when they hit the real world, they’re not ready.
Culture
We live in a world of instant gratification. People expect results fast. They see social media praise and think recognition should be easy and automatic.
Personality
Some use entitlement as a defense. It can mask insecurity or low self-worth. For others, it’s a sign of narcissism. They truly believe they’re better than others.
Entitlement vs. Healthy Self-Esteem
This part matters. Not all confidence is entitlement.
People with healthy self-esteem believe they matter. But they also know they have to earn trust and respect.
Let’s compare:
Healthy Self-Esteem
"I have value and deserve respect."
Earns results through effort
Respects others’ needs and limits
Leads to confidence and resilience
Entitlement
"I’m better and deserve more."
Expects results without effort
Thinks their needs matter most
Leads to frustration and conflict
As a leader, you want to support confidence. But you also have to confront entitlement.
Why It’s a Problem in the Fire Service
Fire culture depends on teamwork. When one person acts entitled, it creates imbalance.
The team starts to feel resentment. Standards slide. Attitudes shift.
You can’t afford that.
You’ve worked to build trust, consistency, and accountability. Entitlement pulls that apart. It says, “I don’t have to follow the rules.” But good teams don’t work that way.
What Leaders Can Do
Entitlement is hard to manage—but not impossible. Here’s how to handle it:
1. Set Clear Expectations
Don’t assume people know what’s expected. Spell it out. Be clear about roles, duties, and standards.
Write it down. Review it often. Post it where everyone can see it.
When there’s no ambiguity, there’s less room for excuses.
2. Focus on Behavior, Not Attitude
You can’t read minds. Don’t try to guess why someone’s acting entitled. Just deal with what you see.
Use this model: Situation – Behavior – Impact
Example:
“When you didn’t clean the apparatus after your shift, the next crew had to pick up the slack. That affected their prep time.”
Stick to facts. Describe the behavior. Explain the impact.
3. Enforce Standards Consistently
Fairness is critical. Everyone has to follow the same rules—probies, seasoned firefighters, and officers.
Don’t ignore bad behavior from “favorites” or senior staff. If others see you letting it slide, you lose trust.
Be firm. Be fair. Be consistent.
4. Document Everything
Write it down. Every time you have a conversation about performance, keep a record. Note what was said. Note how they responded.
This protects you. It also gives you a paper trail if things escalate.
Partner with your administration. Make sure they know what’s going on and how you’re addressing it.
5. Use a Formal Plan When Needed
If informal coaching doesn’t work, move to a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP).
This is not punishment. It’s clarity.
The PIP should say:
What needs to change
What success looks like
What will happen if it doesn’t improve
Be direct. Give support. Set a deadline.
What Not To Do
Don’t avoid the issue.
Don’t hope it goes away.
Don’t let your frustration build until you snap.
Entitlement doesn’t fix itself.
And don’t take it personally. You didn’t create it. You’re just the one who has to manage it.
You are not responsible for other people’s happiness. But you are responsible for the health of your team.
Protecting Your Culture
Culture is built by what you allow and what you confront.
If you let entitled behavior slide, you’re teaching your crew that it’s okay.
But when you hold the line, you show everyone what matters.
Attitudes spread. If you tolerate entitlement, it will grow. If you push back on it, others will follow.
You promote what you permit.
Five Questions for Reflection and Conversation
Where have I seen entitlement in my crew?
Be honest. Think about specific people and behaviors.Have I been consistent in enforcing standards?
Or have I let some things slide?What expectations have I not made clear?
Are there things I assume people know, but haven’t spelled out?What message is my silence sending?
Am I unintentionally promoting the wrong behavior?How can I support healthy confidence while confronting entitlement?
What can I do to encourage growth without rewarding poor behavior?
Final Thoughts
You can’t lead a team if you’re walking on eggshells.
Entitlement weakens your leadership. It confuses your crew. It divides your station.
You don’t have to fix it all today. But you do need to act.
Start by setting clear expectations. Name the behavior. Enforce the standard. And protect your culture.
It won’t be easy. But it will be worth it.
You’ve earned the right to lead. Don’t let entitlement lead instead.
